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Have a laugh....... some of them are quite funny actually !!
* The night was dark, the moon was high,
I stopped my car....u wondered why?
I leant so close, u felt shy.
I uttered those three words....
I ......la.......puncture !!
* You = cute
You = sweet
You = intelligent
You = amazing
You = perfect
Me = liar ;-)
* I have a confession to make, ever since I have known u,
Its hard for me to forget u.
Every night u appear in my dreams
And I find my self shouting.....
GHOST !!! GHOST !!!
* I look at the stars, the stars r beautiful
Then I look at you......
I ......
I .......
I rather look at the stars again.
* Look at the world as one big chocolate cake.
It would never be complete without few sweets n nuts.
Sweets like ME and nuts like YOU.
* Good looking people r hard to find.
That's why u don't ......
That's y u don't see me often.
* When u feel sad....
To cheer up just go to the mirror and say,
"damn I am really sooo cute" u will overcome ur sadness.
But don't make this a habit.....
Coz liars go to hell !!!!
* Jassi singh tells his gf, "come home tomorrow, no one will be at
home." When she goes the next day to his home.......
There was NO ONE at home.
* Your brain will be refreshed in the next five seconds.....
5......
4.......
3.......
2.......
1........
LOADING.....
ERROR: no brain detected.
* WIFE : " I wish I was a newspaper, so I'd be in ur hands all day."
HUSBAND : " I too wish that u were a newspaper, so I could have a new one everyday."
* Neighbors Meet In Heaven
Joe dies and goes to heaven, where upon entering the pearly gates, he sees his neighbor
and friend Kent.
"Hey Joe!" exclaims Kent. "I'm surprised to see you here!"
"Yeah, me too!" replies Joe. "So I guess we're both dead, huh! Say Kent, how did you die?"
Kent replies, "I died of hypothermia. How about you?"
"Well," starts Joe, "I was sure that my wife was cheating on me, so I rushed home from work,
barged in the door and while yelling at her, I tore the house up searching for a lover.
After I failed to find anyone there, I was so ashamed and heartbroken to have put my
wife through my rantings, that I had a heart attack and died."
"That's too bad," says Kent. "If you had looked in the deep freeze, then maybe we'd both
still be alive."
* After marriage you realize that there is bound to be a mismatch. You wish there was an
EVALUATION PERIOD or at least a sample down load or a DEMO version !
* A Dell technician received a call from a customer who was enraged because his computer had
told him he was "bad and an invalid". The tech explained that the computer's "bad command"
and "invalid" responses shouldn't be taken personally.
* FIVE reasons Computers must Be female...
1- No one but their creator understands their internal logic.
2- Even your smallest mistakes are immediately committed to memory for future reference.
3- The native language used to communicate with the other computers is incomprehensible to
everyone else.
4- The message, "Bad command or filename", is about as informative as "if you don't know
why I'm mad at you, then I'm certainly not going to tell you".
5- As soon as you make a commitment to one, you find yourself spending half your paycheck
on accessories for it.
* John, David and Frank who were lost in the forest and were captured by cannibals. The
cannibal king told the prisoners that they could live if they passed a trial.
The first step of the trial was to go to the forest and get ten pieces of the same kind of
fruit. All three men went their separate ways to gather the fruit. John came back and said to
the king, "I brought ten apples". The king explained the trial to him, "You have to shove the
fruit up your but without any expression on your face, or you'll be eaten."
The first apple went in... but on the second one he winced out in pain,so he was killed.
David arrived and showed the king ten berries. When the king explained the trial to him he
thought to himself that this should be easy.1...2...3...4...5...6...7...8... and on the ninth
berry he burst out in laughter and was killed.
John and David met in heaven. John asked, "Why did you laugh, you almost got away with it!"
David replied, "I couldn't help it, I looked up and saw Frank coming back with pineapples.* HOW WOULD A MUMBAI TAPORI GIVE AN ADVT.IN MATRIMONIAL COLUMN FOR A SUITABLE GIRL---------------------------------------Apun Pakia!!! Umar 30 saal,wajan 80 killo aur5 1/ 2 phoot height kya,poora kasrat body !!!......abhi wo bole to,kya hai na apun ko bhi life mesettle hone ka maangta,isiliye yeah adverteezment apunpaper me chaap riye la hai...Apun maanta hai apun Tapori hai,bahut log ka pungi bajayela hai magarkya hai naa baap,apun ka bhi izzat hai markit me!!!Apun ko bhi public shaadi-biyah me bolati hai woh bhiizzat se!Saaal ka 5/6 peti to apun aaram se kama leta hai...buri aadat bole to daaru aur bidi, abhi daaru konnahi pita - yaar. Akkha bada bada log apun log sejaasti chada leta hai...Ab chokiri apun ko aisa maangta hai...Bole to aik dam jhakas maal, patakha, aik dampatakha...thoda padi likhi hongi to chalengakion ke saala yeah kabhi kabhi form bharne ke liyesaala apun ko 25 log ka hath pair jodna padta hai..Apun jo hai na shaadi ki baad aikdam sudhar jaayinga iman se...apun ka baccha log ko apun pada likka taporibanayinga...bole to Tapori Doctor,Tapori computer waala aur bhibohat kuch...Maa kasam shadi ke baad apun kisi bhi chikni ko linenahi denga...Dekho baap apun ko shadi ke baad mekoi chokri ki family ka lafda nahi maangta hai..han bole to kabab me haddi nahi banane ka kya!Koi saala beech mein aayenga to uska game bajadalenga.Abhi yeah sub accha lage to apun ko contact karne kakya!Munna Mobile ke pichchoo,Pappu Pager ka Right Hand,ShanPatti Nagar,Hairan Gali No. 420,Pareshan Road, Bhai Ka Area.(This joke is sent by one of my good friend named Shikha)* You will simply enjoy these...BOY : May I hold your hand?
GIRL : No thanks, it isn't heavy.
GIRL : Say you love me! Say you love me!
BOY : You love me...
GIRL : If we become engaged will you give me a ring??
BOY : Sure, what's your phone number??
GIRL : I think the poorest people are the happiest.
BOY : Then marry me and we'll be the happiest couple
GIRL : Darling, I want to dance like this forever.
BOY : Don't you ever want to improve??
BOY : I love you and I could die for you!
GIRL : How soon??
BOY : I would go to the end of the world for you!
GIRL : Yes, but would you stay there??Girlfriend : "...And are you sure you love me and no one else ?"
Boyfriend : "Dead Sure! I checked the whole list again yesterday".Teacher : "Now, children, if I saw a man beating a donkey and stopped him, what virtuewould I be showing?"
Student : "Brotherly love".* Koai patther se na mare mere dewane koNuclear power ka zamana hai bomb se ura do saley ko
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